on high blood pressure... [02 May 2005|05:39pm] everything comes out the same, no matter wheather you make it hard on yourself or not. post comment

"You've been in the toilet!" [24 Aug 2004|01:37am] [ mood | thankful ] [ music | 311 - LOVE SONG ] i have not posted anything in months even tho i have had plenty to say. maybe the problem is that i dont know where to start. i have met so many diverse and amazing poeple in the past year who dont get enough credit for what they do for one another on a daily basis. when people look at "kids" our age they see generation "X"... the screw-ups. when i look at us i see something so amazing with so much love, talent, and compassion for each other. even tho not all of us who run in the same circle always get along with each other, you know everyone has your back when you need it. no matter what, no matter how many fights, bitter words, dirty looks, "he said" "she said", differences of opinions, or just growing apart takes place, the ones who you started with will be the first to catch you when you fall. i have an amazing guy in my life that i am so in love with. whats even more amazing is that he is so in love with me and i dont know if i have ever been happier. i have such an amazing support system. my brothers are the best ones that i could ever ask for. my hoobeda jenkins is always there for me wen i need him and he is such a great guy. talk about amazing. he doesnt know it, but i admire him. and aj is full of so much love for his friends and family that you cant help but love his silly self. i have been lucky enough to be such a huge part of his life and i have loved and been so thankful for every second of it. if any one of you dont know either one of my brothers, you are missing out and i feel sad for you. justine- she is one of the first people to see something in me and befriend me. i know everyone has their own opinion of each other and that i can respect, but justine is a bright young woman who people underestimate. but one day she will surprise all of you. and i say "all of you" cause i already know what she's capable of. if you dont then thats sad. its ok to not know who you are or what you want or where you'll be in 5 or 10 years. thanks for everything, esp the support justine. emy- life is "precious". love as much as you laugh. viktor- it's ok to change your style. if they dont like it, fuck em. thanks for the laughs and porn you left on my laptop. hope alaska is fun. philip- you dont have to be blood to be family. phil is another person that i admire so much. he makes me laugh and feel like i belong whenever im around. thanks for just being there phil and for all the hugs. kenji- wow. what an amazing person. i admire kenji more than most adults that i know. kenji is the most honest and sincere person that i have ever met and i have learned so much from him. he has taught me to keep an open mind and that there is good in everyone. kenji loves so purely and i strive to be that incredible someday. nicole- its ok to need someone. thanks for helping me see that. richie- richie has taught me that friendship is more than just a word. and that its ok to keep loving someone even if they have disappointed you in the past. i know that richie has been an incredible friend to everyone who will read this. richie would give his last nickle to you if you needed it. even if you lied to him or have disappointed him in the past, he forgives and forgets and loves you for all your worth anyway. i dont know anyone else who can do that. with everything that he goes thru with the law, friends, and family, he still finds time for you no matter whats going on in his life. he'll drop everything just to listen to your problems and he never complains to anyone about anything. if you havent thanked richie lately for all that he's done for you, you should. i know that my "thank you" is long over-due. so thank YOU richie. unfortunately i have regrets. everyone always claims "NO REGRETS". but i am not everyone. most days i am not even anyone. but the regrets i have are there. one of them include someone in my life that i have been so unfair to. she is one of the strongest, most compassionate, beautiful (inside and out), classiest, forgiving, talented, smart, and loved person that i have ever met. i envy her courage so much, but i have never even given her a chance for friendship. i listened to other's opinions and ruined it. the funny thing is that she has no idea how amazing and one-of-a-kind she is. Nicole Maria Driscoll, thats you... (hope i spelled that right) i know that this entry is long, but its also long over-due. so thank you to everyone that i have met and gotten to know over the past months. i hope everyone has had a great summer and that everyone appreciates who they have and what they have rather than complaining about what could or should have been. and never forget that someone out there loves you. i promise. <3 4 comments|post comment

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